Last night I couldn't sleep.
My mind was just swirling with thoughts of Max... I can not believe that he will be here in less then a month. I am I ready for another baby? How will this labor and delivery be different from my first? Will he be a good sleeper? What will he smell like? What will it feel like to be in the hospital but have my baby in a separate room? How many tests and exams will he need? Will he have hair? How many different nurses will take care of him? How little will he be? What time of the day will he be born? When visitors come will they be able to see and hold him? Will he have tubes hooked up to him the entire time we are at the hospital? Will I have to listen to him cry from across the room and not be able to hold him? How will Morgen respond to meeting his brother for the first time? Will he be able to breastfeed or will he be on a feeding tube? Will my bond with him happen instantly or will it happen more gradually? Will he look like me or Spencer? How long will he need to stay in the hospital?...
Those are just a few of the millions of questions I have in my head. I did not even want to attempt trying to write out all my questions about when he comes home and when he needs to go back to the hospital for surgery. How I am I suppose to sleep when there are so many unknowns? How do I turn off my worried, mommy mind long enough to relax at night?
My mind was just swirling with thoughts of Max... I can not believe that he will be here in less then a month. I am I ready for another baby? How will this labor and delivery be different from my first? Will he be a good sleeper? What will he smell like? What will it feel like to be in the hospital but have my baby in a separate room? How many tests and exams will he need? Will he have hair? How many different nurses will take care of him? How little will he be? What time of the day will he be born? When visitors come will they be able to see and hold him? Will he have tubes hooked up to him the entire time we are at the hospital? Will I have to listen to him cry from across the room and not be able to hold him? How will Morgen respond to meeting his brother for the first time? Will he be able to breastfeed or will he be on a feeding tube? Will my bond with him happen instantly or will it happen more gradually? Will he look like me or Spencer? How long will he need to stay in the hospital?...
Those are just a few of the millions of questions I have in my head. I did not even want to attempt trying to write out all my questions about when he comes home and when he needs to go back to the hospital for surgery. How I am I suppose to sleep when there are so many unknowns? How do I turn off my worried, mommy mind long enough to relax at night?
2 comments:
Just remember that your Heavenly Father has prepared you for this and you will be able to handle all that comes your way. You also have your family and friends in your corner ready to help.
I wish I had an easy answer for you! If you get an easy, pass it along to me! :-)
Honey, all I can say is I love you! As I have been going through my own trials the last 3months I just try to remember that the Lord will not give me more than I can handle. Of course that scares me also, because what if he knows I can handle more, but I am not sure. Thankfully we have prayer, blessings, the Holy Ghost, and most importantly our Savior to hold our hand in our time of need. I love you sweetie!!!!!
Post a Comment